I’ve stopped being sorry for all my soft. I won’t apologise because I miss you, or because I said it, or because I text you first, or again. I think everyone spends too much time trying to close themselves off. I don’t want to be cool or indifferent, I want to be honest. If I love you at 5AM, I’d damn well rather that you know I felt it. If I love you two hours later, I’ll tell you then too. Listen, I won’t wait double the time it takes for you to text me back because I don’t want to. I don’t care enough to be patient with you. I’m happy, you made me feel that way, don’t you want to know? So that’s how it’s going to be. I’m going to leave myself as open as a church door. And I’m going to wake you up before the crack of dawn to tell you that I’m fucking joyful, no pretending, not from me, not ever. Would you like some coffee, would you please kiss me? Here, these are my hands, this is my mouth, it is all yours.
You wanted smooth sailing and I’ve always been a tsunami.
always on my team.
An uncanny knack for ruining good things. Flaws slowly revealed as time passes. And sometimes imperfections are not so easily overlooked.
there’s something jarring about goodbyes.
the fact that you don’t know when the next time you’ll see that person will be.
it could be tomorrow.
it could be a week from now
it could be a years later where you vaguely have a definition of who they were to fill in with who they are now,
albeit an imperfect outline because people change over time.
or you could never see them again.
…people step into your life everyday
there are the passerbys.
the wide-eyed child whose smiles starts your day with enthusiasm.
the gentleman who holds the door open for you at the coffeeshop,
the person whose newspaper you peeked at this morning,
a glimpse of the headlines.
& then those who stick around for just a bit longer.
the ones you share laughter with,
have a conversation, share a meal.
family, friends, those who shape perception, goals,
and leave faint fingerprints on your heart.
for them, goodbyes are harder,
but so much more meaningful.
i relish in the seconds longer hug.
i indulge in that lingering moment when we release,
and our eyes understand that this too, shall pass.
i’ll see you soon.
i’ll see you someday.
because i am a little bit more who i am today,
because i have met you.